Are Alternative Options to Marriage Biogical Tests?

                The majority of chapter 2 in the textbook was concerned with the declining percentage of couples that choose to commit to a long-term relationship with each other in the form of marriage. Aja Gabel presented to us in her essay, “The Marriage Crisis,” that the modern model of marriage is a result of a changing America. She explains that this modernistic view of marriage differs from one in the 1960's, during which a couple would've been more likely to stay together without regard to economic pressures. However, in today's age, a couple is more likely to divorce simply because they are unhappy, unlike an unhappy couple in the 1960's. I do see this as a growing pattern that is increasingly growing in couples, especially in those that marry at a younger age or that marry with only a high school degree. With growing expectations from either partner, and the expectation of financial stability, it is becoming increasingly easier for the marriage to end if either factor is missing in the commitment. With commitment declining, we are seeing an increase in cohabitation among unmarried couples, even with children in the family as an alternative method of creating a traditional family household. This presents the issue of a failing institution that represented values taught to children such as meaning, purpose, direction, and stability, as stated by Brad Wilcox. Conversely though, marriage is not the most important factor when it comes to a family; rather, it is the care that is shown within the family structure, whether it be in marriage, cohabitation, or single parenthood, that makes the true difference.

                Do I think marriage is alive and strong in America? Allison Pugh states, “Maybe we’re asking too much of traditional forms of marriage to be able to absorb all these changes.” We may be getting married to each other less in today’s world due to socio-economic issues, but that does not certainly mean that we are avoiding love. As the studies show, half of the 40-percent that believe that marriage is becoming increasingly obsolete still want to be with someone else. We have been shaping the ways we love one another since the 1960’s, and cohabitation is simply one of the results that has blossomed from our “love search.” Of course, there are obvious psychological and social benefits from marriage; however, cohabitation is fully capable of fulfilling these same personal needs in most cases. As Pugh also states in Aja Gabel’s essay, children can equally benefit from an unmarried couple as they would from a married couple.

This begs the question whether or not marriage is still a part of our social fabric, and although I do think that it is still present within our social norms, I do not think that it is a required one. Happiness is one of the most important factors of our lives, and whether marriage brings that to us personally or not, is 100-percent up to the individual. Although there still are obvious social pressures to be married, we should not cave into these pressures to determine what it is we need in order to provide the structure in the traditional sense. As discussed in Gabel’s essay, these social pressures could cause the opposite results from what we wish to gain from marriage. It is shown in the example of a single mother who feels that she must engage in marriage at all costs just to provide a father for her child that these pressures could consequently destroy the very values that we wish to protect. It has continually been observed that these missing factors can be compensated for in other forms of family structure and a growing instability of financial and personal issues only further opens the window to newer opinions that can be chosen to view. Furthermore, we have shaped our culture to the new options that we are now presented, and in today’s age, marriage is now longer a mandatory one.

Even though the structures of our culture are largely determined by socio-economic factors, there is a scientific vantage point to all of this. As observed by Kayt Sukel in her essay, “Rethinking Monogamy,” prairie voles are known to be socially monogamous; however, they are not genetically monogamous. These same prairie voles are viewed as choice candidates for studies conducted on the understanding of monogamy in humans. This raises a red flag as only 3-percent of mammalian species exhibit monogamous behavior, but as stated in Sukel’s essay, this is primarily in the form of social monogamy. In Natalie Rivera’s essay over the topic of “temporary marriage,” it is thought that this form of marriage in which a couple can choose the length of time they wish to be married, after which the marriage will end without the hassle of divorce, will reduce the growing rates of divorce. However, temporary marriage is seen more of way to determine whether or not your partner is the right choice to mate with. This comes off to me as a sort of bridge between the observations of prairie vole behaviors and the changes in marriage in today’s world. Based off of this scientific study, I see temporary marriage and cohabitation as a biological mechanism that goes off in our brains in an attempt to observe a potential mate. This allows us to determine whether or not a person is suitable to ensure evolutionary success. If we are truly monogamous as society encourages us to be, then why have we moved more towards these options (that seem more like biological tests) of temporary marriage and cohabitation?

- 2014, A&G

“I felt my heart crack slowly like a pomegranate, spilling its seeds.”― Trebor Healey

My full name, Alexandro Granados, has always been a sort of mystery to me. Ever since I was little I never took any interest in where my name came from or any other details about its meanings. I never particularly liked my name; thus, I always made people call me by the shorter version of it, Alex. In all honesty, I have always preferred my mother's maiden name, Lira, and always questioned why I didn't get that last name instead of Granados. It wasn't until time passed that I learned to accept my name, especially my first name, for what it was and even went as far as to embrace it. I can remember the amount pride I had for it during my middle school years, knowing that I am the only one I've ever directly known to have the same first name as I.

                In my opinion, high school was pretty interesting for me whenever the time came for my teachers to take attendance at the start of the class. This was usually interesting for me due to every single teacher getting my name wrong, pronouncing it as Alejandro or even calling me Alejandra or Alexandra. I've always known that they didn't have any bad intentions though; my teachers were simply just dazed by the odd spelling of my name. However, I can’t say that I didn't get irritated at times because of the constant mispronunciations or gender switches. I've caught myself in certain occasions going as far as raising my voice saying, “a-lek-SAN-dro!” at the poor teacher or substitute teacher. Even though I was extremely passionate of correcting those that would pronounce my name wrong, I had no idea what my name even meant. It wasn't until my junior year of high school that I started to have interest on where it came from or what it symbolized. That’s when I finally gave in and decided to do some research.

                As I did some research on my name, I started finding that my first name, Alexandro, meant something that I didn't expect at all, it meant “defender” and “protector of mankind.” I also found that my name is of Greek origin. However, I did have trouble finding any more information other than the origin and meaning. I have also done research on my last name, Granados. I've only been able to find that my last name is of Spanish origin, with “pomegranate” being the most stand-out meaning to me. My last name is actually the inspiration behind my blog name and most of my social media usernames. Besides “pomegranate,” I've also found that my last name holds other meanings such as these found on http://www.kabalarians.com/Male/granados.htm:  

• The name of Granados has made you rather reserved and, at times, secretive about your personal affairs.
•  As a result, people find it difficult to understand you and you suffer through loneliness.
• You are interested in understanding life along scientific and philosophical lines.
• Also, you derive much enjoyment from reading and from being out in nature.
• At times, you find it easier to express your thoughts in writing, rather than verbally.

 As for heritage, I have not been able to find much information or clues as to the roots of the name within my family. I have assumed though that my ancestors came from Spain or other parts of Europe. My parents have also hinted that there is possibly Italian within our ancestral roots; nevertheless, that is debated. Looking back though, I don’t think that I would change my name for any thinkable reason. I feel like it gives me some form of innate uniqueness in my life, especially my first name.

     - 2014, A&G

"The best way to predict the future is to invent it"

Although my past is not very exciting or the most interesting, it has affected who I have become. All my years from my kindergarten days until the ends of my middle school years were more or less average. I had very few friends and I dedicated most of my time to everything and anything relating to school, especially anything having to do with science. However, during the last couple months of my time at middle school, I was allowed to join the guitar players in my band class, and that's when everything changed for me. I became immersed with music (indie rock, post-hardcore, rock, hardcore) and I taught myself how to play guitar with some help from the other guitarists, who quickly became close friends of mine. Music and guitar allowed me a release from the uptight world that I had kept myself in for years, even allowing me to feel like I art could help me in a way; thus, poetry came into my world too. In 2009, when high school came along, I was still friends with those that helped me open up and even ran cross-country for most of my high school because of them. for my first year and a half at high school, everything was going fine, but after a certain point I started to feel alone and abandoned by those close to me. I fell into a deep hole and I turned to poetry and music to help feel something. I formed a band with a long-time friend of mine and another friend as well to occupy myself. It was one of the best mistakes I had made, I say "best mistakes" because the band failed terribly, but I had gained one of the greatest friends I have had so far. This friend helped me through any personal issues that I was going through at the time; saving me a couple times as well. She knew me better than my most anybody and pushed me out of my hole in order to continue to do great for the remainder of my high school, up until our graduation from Rio Mesa High School in 2013.

My present has mainly become college (after skipping an entire year), currently striving for a major in biology. College feels extremely different to me, especially after taking some time off from school, but it hasn't been too hard adjusting to everything as I was expecting it to be. However, it hasn't been completely easy either due to falling back into a hole once again, but distractions are good, in my opinion. My present has also been consisting of pushing myself to want to improve my poetry skills. Other than this, my present consists of little details that get lost within my everyday life.

Writing about the future, my future, has always been somewhat of a challenge to me due to the unpredictability of life and its obstacles. Nevertheless, as my title quotes, "the best way to predict the future is to invent it," I do believe that we have the power to shape our future into what we dream it to be, whether it will always remain a dream or someday become our reality. With that being said, I see myself earning my degree in biology and possibly transferring to Channel Islands University or UCLA, with the possibility of focusing on bio-engineering or teaching biology. It could go either way from my view of it at this point.

- 2014, A&G